Jan 30


I have never seen the point of eating chicken wings. In fact, I’m not sure they actually qualify as food. Wings are more accurately described as breaded, seasoned, and deep-fried chicken bones with skin. Yes, there’s a little bit of meat on a wing, but it’s so minuscule and requires so much effort to ingest that it’s really not worthwhile. The increasing popularity of chicken wings is the result of a very successful marketing campaign on the part of the food service industry, which realized that you should never throw away your scraps if you can convince people to buy them. (That’s also the explanation for the breadsticks that pizza delivery places all sell now. Those used to be leftover dough that got thrown away, until some clever marketer realized that you could get people to pay for them.)
I don’t have any real problem with this; if some folks are willing to buy fried bones, that’s their own business. But now things are getting downright bizarre. Appliance maker Rival now offers the Wing-It, a deep-fryer whose only purpose is to enable you to make your own chicken wings. Why in God’s name would anyone want to do that? If you’re going to prepare your own chicken at home, would it not make more sense to buy the chicken parts that actually have meat on them? Why would you go out of your way to buy the most worthless part of the chicken and a special tool for cooking it? Someone please explain this to me.

Jan 28

Evil is everywhere

The scrolling text from the beginning of Star Wars Episode III has been revealed. Here’s what it says:

Episode III
War! The Republic is crumbling
under attacks by the ruthless
Sith Lord, Count Dooku.
There are heroes on both sides.
Evil is everywhere.
In a stunning move, the
fiendish droid leader, General
Grievous, has swept into the
Republic capital and kidnapped
Chancellor Palpatine, leader of
the Galactic Senate.
As the Separatist Droid Army
attempts to flee the besieged
capital with their valuable
hostage, two Jedi Knights lead a
desperate mission to rescue the
captive Chancellor….

The movie premieres on May 19.

Jan 24

We do stuff

After perusing all of the pages at the Huh? corporate website, I still don’t have a clue what they actually do. But I’m convinced of one thing that I know I can never prove: Dogbert is behind this. His pawprints are all over it.

Jan 24

Virus warning

On Saturday I went to Raleigh Little Theatre to help hang lights for Blue, the next play that opens February 11. Rehearsals for Blue are already in progress, and I saw that the call board (a sort of easel-mounted bulletin board) has been set up in the house near the stage. Along with the rehearsal sign-in sheet and a couple of other routine notices, I spotted this on the call board:

Warning – New Virus!

There is a new virus. The code name is WORK. If you receive WORK from your colleagues, your boss, via e-mail, or from anyone else, do not touch it under any circumstances. This virus wipes out your private life completely.

If you should happen to come in contact with this virus, take two friends and go straight to the nearest bar. Order drinks immediately and after three rounds each, you will find that WORK has been completely deleted from your system.

Forward this virus warning immediately to at least five friends.
Should you realize you do not have five friends, this means you are already infected by this virus and WORK already controls your life.
If this is the case, go to the bar on your own and stay until you make at least five friends. Then retry.

I think I have five friends, but am not entirely positive so I’m headed for the bar anyway…..it never hurts to be safe.

This virus could definitely be a problem for RLT. I’m sure WORK can disrupt the process of rehearsing a play. Fortunately, most of the theatre people I know are already applying the recommended countermeasure on a regular basis.

Jan 17

The luckiest guy ever

Here’s a health tip. If you start experiencing unexplained toothaches and blurred vision, ask yourself “Have I been operating a nail gun recently?”
Key quote: “If you’re going to have a nail in the brain, that’s the way you want it to be.”

Jan 14

It’s what’s for dinner

For years, scientists have been trying to figure out how we mammals managed to replace the dinosaurs as the dominant vertebrate lifeforms on Earth. Did we adapt to changing conditions better than they did? Perhaps not. A newly discovered fossil suggests that we ate them.

Jan 09

Elvis at 70

Yesterday was Elvis Presley’s 70th birthday. If he had actually lived to be 70, what would he have looked like? Scientists at St. Andrew’s University (wherever that is) decided to find out and used computers to artificially age a photo of Elvis. Looking at the result, I have to say that I hope I look that good when I’m 70.

Jan 03

My paradise

Tourists in Germany can now visit a tropical island only 50 kilometers from Berlin. Well, technically, it’s not really an island, but it has a beach, a lagoon, a rain forest, and a tropical village (just look at the pictures). And the weather is always nice, because the whole thing is under a dome.